What an offer Mr. Johnson had been waiting entirely too long at the doctor's office. His appointment was for 9:00 and it was nearly 10:30. Finally, an attractive nurse appeared at the waiting room door and said, "Let's go get a room." "Honey, I appreciate the offer," he said, "but I've been waiting so long I'd hate to lose my turn now!" The Sun Bay Paper Page 20 January 7, 2022 - January 13, 202 Overheard at the Bar My son asked me if a punch bowl is a place where you keep names of people you want to punch... I told him “I usually keep them in my head but, keeping them in a fancy crystal bowl seems kinda classy.” What exactly is junk? It’s time to benefit from the active real estate market. Contact me for competent real estate expertise. Cathie Lewis, Realtor Pfeifer Realty Group, LLC SWFL, Fort Myers Beach, Sanibel & Captiva Islands is All About Home Real Estate Specialist It’s something you move from one place to another over and over and then you finaly throw it away ....... one week before you’ll need it. Pas s w o rd s ? During a recent password audit, our I.T. discovered a blonde was using the following password: MickeyMinniePlutoHueyLouieDeweyDonaldGoofyBoston When they asked why such a long password, she said she was told that it had to be at least 8 characters long and include at least one capital Gi l l i gans I s l and 2 Abe and Esther are flying to Australia for a two week vacation to celebrate their 40th anniversary. Suddenly, over the public address system, the Captain announces, "Ladies and Gentlemen, I am afraid I have some very bad news. Our engines have ceased functioning and we will attempt an emergency landing. Luckily, I see an uncharted island below us and we should be able to land on the beach. However, the odds are that we may never be rescued and will have to live on the island for the rest of our lives!" Thanks to the skill of the flight crew, the plane lands safely on the island. An hour later Abe turns to his wife and asks, "Esther, did we pay our $5,000 PBS pledge check yet?" No, sweetheart," she responds. Abe, still shaken from the crash landing, then asks, "Esther, Did you remember to send checks for the Visa and MasterCard this month?" "Oh, no! I'm sorry. I forgot to send those checks," she says. "One last thing, Esther. did you pay our American Express card yet, It was a hefty sum this past month?" he asks. "Oh, forgive me, Abie," begged Esther. "I didn't send that one, either." Abe grabs her and gives her the biggest kiss in 40 years. Esther pulls away and asks him, "What was that for?" Abe answers, "They’re definitely going to find us!" Crayons The kindergarten class had settled down to its coloring books. Willie came up to the teacher's desk and said, "Miss Francis, I ain't go no crayons." "Willie," Miss Francis said, "you mean, "I don't have any crayons.' You don't have any crayons. We don't have any crayons. They don't have any crayons. Do you see what I'm getting at?" "Not really," Willie said, "What happened to all them crayons?" Ye s Dear ! A married couple was celebrating their 60th wedding anniversary. At the party everybody wanted to know how they managed to stay married so long in this day and age. The husband responded, "When we were first married we came to an agreement -- I would make all the major decisions and my wife would make all the minor decisions. And in 60 years of marriage we have never needed to make a major decision." N o P ro b l e m On their honeymoon, the new husband told his bride, "I have a confession to make that I should have made before, but I was concerned that it might affect our relationship. "What is it?" his new bride asked lovingly. "I'm a golf fanatic," he said. "I think about golf constantly. I'll be out on the golf course every weekend, every holiday, and every chance I get. If it comes to a choice between your wishes and golf, golf will always win." His new bride pondered this for a moment and said, "I thank you for your honesty. Now in the same spirit of honesty, I should tell you that I've concealed something about my own past that you should know about. The truth is, "I'm a hooker." "No problem," said her husband, "just widen your stance a little, and overlap your grip, and that should straighten your shot right up." Want a New View?
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